Sure...why not? Let's apartment hunt again

Life has been crazy lately. Between work, friends, family and travel- it's been a whirlwind and I can't believe it's already April!

Spring is probably my least favorite season (I know, everyone thinks I'm nuts) but there's something about it that just rubs me the wrong way. The positive side? It mean's we're one step closer to my all-time favorite season...Summer. 

Meanwhile, as we wade through April and May in pursuit of June there's lots on the agenda. My best friend from college, Martha, is coming into town this weekend. We're going to have a girls weekend and catch up and I cannot wait! It's almost been a year since we've seen each other but since we talk almost daily, it feels like it was just yesterday.

Halloween Circa 2008

Summer 2012 on Martha's Vineyard

We had a wonderful first few days of Passover in Florida last weekend. We had a few Seders- first a BIG one with about 30 people, at my grandparents house in Florida on Saturday night (a few nights premature), a second smaller one, still in Florida on Monday night. And finally, a belated celebration with my dad's side of the family, last Saturday night up in Carmel.

They were not without drama (when is it ever with my family?) but it was wonderful to spend time with family and get to celebrate another holiday with the boy.

Speaking of which...The boy and I are apartment hunting! Big news for this blogger as I've never lived with a boy. The PIC and I will be vacating our apartment at the end of June and moving on to the big girl world of cohabitation.

My return to apartment hunting has been just as stress-inducing fun as last time around. Agents to the left of me, brokers to the right.... it's as if the market waits for potential renters, baiting them with words like "pre war" "sunsplashed" and "steps to Central Park" all the while looking to pounce with completely unfounded broker fees, condo approvals, application fees and absurd meeting times. "No I cannot meet you 85 blocks from my work at 1pm. Yes, that's right I do have a full time job" how were you expecting me to pay for this overpriced nugget of NYC real estate? In hugs? Great talk.

I will say, going through it with the boy has been great. He's been so supportive and we've been on the same page every step of the way, which is a great omen for what lies ahead. We've had the same thoughts on what we like and don't like in each place we've seen. We align on our budget, our "wish list", and even on our thoughts of the crazy brokers who bare the overwhelming burden of opening the door for us (i'm not bitter just bewildered that a key-turn gets you 15% of some poor unsuspecting soul's annual rent, maybe i'm in the wrong profession...).

We are focusing our search on 1 bedrooms on the Upper West Side, preferably with a doorman for a price that won't break the bank, ok at least not the WHOLE bank (tall order I know). I get a weird rush each time the door is about to open on a new place. A feeling inside as if this will be the one gem of a new york city apartment that no one else has seen, that is significantly under market value but huge, filled with sunlight and looks exactly like Carrie Bradshaw's Sex and the City digs....right because that's how it works.

For the most part we know what we're getting into before we see a place, but sometimes the only thing that can prepare you, is being there in the moment. Here's a sneak peek at what we've been through the past week, welcome to our roller coaster friends, buckle up.

Our reaction to the view from an 86th street apartment

The result of misleading photos of a place on 93rd

When the dream prewar condo on 95th lacked a condo fee

More to come as we get closer to our move in date, the glory days of packing, organizing and the big one- deciding on furniture.

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Finding Nemo

Apparently now we're in the business of naming winter storms. Who am I to judge? Nemo it is.

Nemo's on the move.

The boy and I were supposed to fly to Florida today to visit my grandparents this weekend. To say I was looking forward to the trip is a severe understatement. I'd mentally packed my suitcase (weeks ago), made a fool-proof-won't-even-forget-underwear list, preemptively decided what I was going to order at my favorite dinner spot & envisioned boarding my Monday morning flight with a warm glow.

Clearly Nemo had other plans...

Winter storm are one thing, I understand we can't control the weather and airlines are looking out for everyone's safety- but for gods sakes- plan ahead. We live in the North East, this isn't the first time a winter storm has hit, GASP, in the peak of winter.

Forecasts came out days before alerting everyone of the storm, yes Delta, that includes you. Yet, the a few nights before the storm, Delta had no plans to add extra call lines, help people change flights,  or allow trips to be rescheduled.

Here's a little insight into what I'm talking about....

Call #1 (Wednesday night)- we're not switching flights, we don't anticipate cancelations; 48 minute hold time
Call # 2 - we're switching flights with the fee waived, not the fare difference; 60 minute hold time
Call # 3- we're waiving fees & fares- all flights are booked. You can connect in DETROIT during the blizzard. Your flight is scheduled to depart on time, hang tight. 55 minute hold time
Call # 4- your flight has been canceled, we can't get you on a new flight until Sunday afternoon. You're returning Monday at 7am? We apologize for the inconvenience. If you'd like a refund we can connect you to our refund department; 1 hour 15 minute hold time + 40 minute hold time with refunds

Fast forward to present day: we're not going Florida for the weekend and I don't anticipate ranking Delta at the top of my Christmas card list next year...call me crazy.

In the spirit of "glass half" which the boy greatly appreciates about my personality, I'm excited for a weekend of snow angels, cozy movies, hot chocolate and gluten-free goodness. I'll be hunkered down on the upper east side (in the land of heat & hot water) if you need me.

XOXO friends, stay safe.

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In loving memory of my aunt Margaret

I have always said that this blog would not only be a way for friends and family to follow what I'm doing, but also as an outlet for me to write what's on my mind. So in this post, I am going to attempt to capture my feelings about the passing of someone very close to my heart. Someone magnificent. Someone I had just started to develop a real relationship with. Someone, I assumed, would be around for years to come and who I'd have the opportunity to grow closer to. 

As I sat down to write this post, I wasn't sure where to start. You see, while we were away enjoying the sun, sand and easy flow of fun, a tragedy struck our family. My aunt- who was still very young at heart and had a lot of life to live- was taken from us suddenly. We were forced, while thousands of miles away, to process the news; to compartmentalize and move on vacationing. How did we do? I'd say as well as could be expected.

For those wondering, I will give a brief explanation of what happened.

Last Monday night, my Aunt Margaret was out playing cards with friends. Her neighbor (who was in the card game) wasn't feeling well so she suggested they head home. Once they got home, she brought her neighbor inside, went home and went to sleep. The next morning her neighbor was unable to reach her so she sent her husband over to check on her. When he went inside-  he found her in her bed.

Upon investigation it was discovered that when she got home the night before, she had forgotten to turn her car off and was killed by carbon monoxide in her sleep. We don't know most of the details but from what we've been able to piece together, an unfortunate chain of events led to a sad and tragic accident. Not sickness, or recklessness or even old age- just an accident, something you can't prepare for, no matter how hard you try. 

My aunt Margaret was 11 years older than my dad. Growing up she lived out on long island and we'd get together for holidays- the occasional thanksgiving, and most hannukah's and passovers. I don't know all the details but family is family and there was tension. So as years passed by, we spent fewer holidays on the island and often spent them with my mom's family. In recent years we have started to come together again, celebrating hannukah together every year and trying to see each other whenever there was a celebration. It's been nice having my dad's side of the family in my life again and over the last 6 months, I've been able to spend more time with aunt Margaret. We've shared happy times and sad, and she even accompanied me on an apartment hunting excursion last summer. For the first time, I felt like I had her as my aunt. It was a wonderful feeling and one that I am so glad I had, even though it was fleeting.

Over the last few days I've been having a particularly hard time. A harder time than I've had with the death of anyone else in my family. I've been lucky in that my grandparents on my mother's side are still alive and most other relatives whom I've lost have been old or sick and while their passing was sad- it wasn't tragic. This experience is completely different. I find myself feeling angry, gipped, frustrated. HOW could this have happened? Is a question that crosses my mind multiple times a day. 

It is hard to explain the way I feel now that she is gone. I'm sad, but I think it's in a different way than many of my other family members. While I am sad for times passed, I am more sad for the times we will not get to have. For the closeness that will never get to develop between us and for the feeling of unfinished business that I haven't been able to shake. I'm sad that I will never get to know aunt Margaret beyond what I already did and that I won't get to learn about who she was as a person and what her life was like growing up. But mostly I'm sad that the relationship we had just begun, was so tragically cut short.

It's impossible to make sense of accidents. We don't know why they happen or what we can do to prevent them. We ask ourselves "why us?" and often the truth is, there is no rhyme or reason.

My aunt Margaret was an elegant, caring, passionate, and devoted woman. She put her family above everyone else and was always there to support you. She never judged and somehow, always understood what you were going through. Her hugs were the best in the world and her gifts were always perfectly on point. She was genuine and kind. She was rare. She was stylish and organized (qualities that i'm only now really learning we shared) and she will be missed every single day.

It's hard to take lessons from things so sad or see the positive side of things when they seem so unfair, but aunt Margaret wouldn't want us to be angry, or bitter. She'd want us to find the lesson in this and figure out what we could do to help others. She was selfless that way. So, check your carbon monoxide detectors, double check your cars and don't take anyone in your life foregranted- aunt Margaret would insist.

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Viva la Mexico

va·ca·tion
/vāˈkāSHən/

Noun

An extended period of recreation, esp. one spent away from home or in traveling.

Or at least that's what the experts say.

The purpose of taking a vacation is to get away from your daily stress. To unwind, to decompress, to spend time with family and friends. To read books you would otherwise toss on the "I-promise-I-will-read-you-one-day-but-that-day-is-sadly-not-today" nightstand pile. To lay in the sun and get a little too tan, to drink beer at 11am and wear a breathing tube to look at fish- and have that not be weird. 

I was lucky enough to embark on a weeklong vacation with my family and the boy last week and it was started out as, just what we all needed. 

My family has a tendency to book flights as early as humanly possible. If a 4am flight existed that got us to our destination in the prime sunshine hours, (hey tanning is tanning) we'd be on it. Luckily the airplane gods have us in their thoughts and the first possible flight for most destinations is 6am. So you bet your bottom dollar we were on it.

Last Saturday 6 of us headed to the airport for our 6am flight. Now if you work backwards you'll realize: boarding is 30 minutes before take off (5:30), check in is an hour before take off (5:00), and wake up is about 1.5 hours before check in. So at 3:30 when the alarm went off, up we got and off we went- 1 cab, two bags, 6 international passport check ins and we were through security. 15 hours of traveling later (a 4.5 hour flight from new york to dallas, a 1 hour time difference, a two hour layover, a 3 hour flight from dallas to cabo, another hour time difference, and a 45 minute car ride to the hotel) and we had arrrrrived. We walked into the lobby around 5pm cabo time, which was 7pm New York time, meaning upon check-in, we had been awake for 15 hours and the day was not yet over.

Once we unpacked, ate and settled into our routine the craziness calmed. It was the first time our winter Lewie family vacation has included significant others and it was a fantastic addition.

We ate great food, read books, got massages, had many laughs, consumed a LOT of alcohol and genuinely enjoyed each others company. It was a fantastic week away with a beautiful back drop.

Enjoy some photos from our trip:

The view from our room

The boy and I at dinner in San Jose

Sunset from Mona Lisa

Everyone out for drinks and sunset views

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Meet the Fockers

It's official.

I'm one site audit, one set of time sheets and a few hours away from freedom. Holiday freedom that is.

I consider myself one of the lucky ones in that each year, my office is closed between Christmas and New Years. The exact dates change every year based on what day of the week the holidays fall on, but this year we're off starting tomorrow through Wednesday January 2nd. It's nice getting "built-in time off" to spend with family at the holidays. Especially when you're in a relationship (newly so or old pros) because it gives you ample time to hang with both sets of family and no one gets all "but you were only here for 4.25 hours and I TOTALLY know you were there for longer" on you. That's the worst.

So, this year I'm heading down to North Carolina with the boy and his family for a week of southern-loving-christmas-having-all-out-family-fun. I'm excited but let's be real, it's my first time meeting this side of the extended family (i've conquered the parents already) and that knocks everyones nerves a little bit. Lucky for me (and everyone involved) I'm not afraid of wine....or gin.

Saturday morning bright and early we're loading into a van with boy's mom, dad, sister and sister's friend for a pain(ful)less 8-hour-all-day-my-leg-is-cramping-I-have-to-pee-I'm-hungry-you-stole-my-arm-rest-no-stopping-let's-get-there-before-dark car ride to the Outer Banks.  Are we there yet?

I'm usually pretty adaptable in any situation and have had my fair share of awkward relationship-family trips. The highlights include an extended family who wasn't down with my faith (and by down I mean they hated it), deer hunting on the regs (I hate guns), and three nights (in a row) on an air mattress with other family members inches from my head. And guess what? I survived. See, told you I was tough.

Yes, meeting the family is always a gamble. How will it go? Will they like me? What if I don't fit in? and is often sprinkled with "I'm-starving-but-we-already-ate-I-should've-packed-snacks" "I-really-need-to-pee-and-cousin-it-has-been-in-the-bathroom-for-an-hour" moments but in the end- it's worth it, even if you sleep on an air mattress.

This year, with my best friend, in a relationship where things are going better than ever, I'm certain it will be wonderful and I'm (gasp!), even excited.

I'm looking forward to spending my built-in-time-off exploring the Outer Banks, a place that means the world to the boy and his family, sharing in their family traditions, and meeting the people who mean the most to the person who means the most to me.

See, I can do sarcastic and loving all at once. Who knew?

Happy holidays blogofollowers. See you next year, a little older, a little wiser, and with a few more aunts & uncles under my belt!

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Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner, Blitzen and Rudolph

Every year the holidays roll around and somehow I feel left out.

I know Channukah is wonderful and miraculous and we're all "yay for the festival of lights, all hail a drop of oil", but I'm sorry to say for me, it doesn't hold a candle to Rudolph. I'm very proud of my heritage and love the story of Channukah but it's just not on the same level- spirit wise- as Christmas.

There's something magical about the pile of gifts, the lights, the ornaments, the lifetime movies, the chocolate santas, the red, the green, the SPARKLE that our beloved Macabee just doesn't deliver.  I've tried to deny it, to ignore it, to bury my shame in copious amounts of gelt while covering myself in blue glitter, but at the end of the day it's just not the same.

What's a jew to do?

Growing up I always wanted lights- I would ask my mom to put white lights on our house in the shape of a jewish star (seemed ingenious to me) so we could "glow" like our neighbors. Each year she explained that lights were a celebration for Christmas, and we had our menorah in the window. Going to a Jewish day school, one would think I'd have missed the whole "left out" gene since everyone was celebrating the same holiday, but I didn't... I always wanted a tree, and ornaments and lights- maybe I was switched at birth and my real name is Mary (only kidding).

One would think over the years I'd have outgrown my christmas, lights, I want to ride a reindeer obsession but alas, I have not. I'm lucky in that my company does a great job celebrating both holidays- we have a menorah lighting every year in the lobby in addition to a big tree (made of teddy bears, that's another story for another day) and our office is closed between Christmas and New Years (before you hate me- consider the fact that I make significantly less than all of you reading this post....yes I'm sure, all of you).

For the past few years I've been away with my family during the week leading up to Christmas so I haven't been in New York to fully experience the holiday thrill but this year- I'm here and I'm living it up BIG time.

Last weekend my PIC's best friend from college was in town and we got tickets to the Radio City Music Hall Christmas Spectacular. For those who haven't been think: glitter, santa, amazingness. The show was so quintessential holidays in New York that i couldn't help but smile.

Three friends on the way to the show

New York Christmas in all its glory!

This weekend the boy and I got our very own tree for his apartment. I started talking about this tree weeks ago, first by asking if his family had one (he's only half christian, I didn't know the rules) then by asking if he usually had one in his apartment and finally by proclaiming- we should get a tree! I think I brought it up every day for the past week until finally on Friday I asked if we could get it on Sunday and hooray, he said yes! He scouted out the best tree selling stand near his apartment and yesterday afternoon, rain and all, off we went.

We picked out the cutest little tree and on the way home we stopped and I got to pick out all of the lights and ornaments! As soon as we arrived at his apartment we got to work stringing lights and hanging ornaments. The boy knew how excited I was, so we kept the lights on all afternoon and evening. Each time I looked at it- I couldn't help but smile! Not only is this my first tree (sorry mom) but it's our first year of holidays together and I couldn't think of a better way to kick them off.

The holidays in New York are a magical time, no matter which holiday you celebrate, but I'm extra thankful this year that I get to celebrate both.

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Spring Forward, Fall Back

..and that's definitely what I did this Fall. I fell, farrr behind on posts.

When I started this blog I promised myself I'd use it as a place to express myself, to share my musings and absurd dating tales and as a way to escape the "should" and just write what I was feeling. But you know how it goes- life happens, time flies and before you know it, two months have passed! So now I'm back and in one not-too-long-please-don't-bore-them-they're-the-only-followers-you-have post, I will try to catch you up on what's been going on.

Fall was filled with friends, family, apple picking, pumpkin carving, parent-meeting, hurricane living and my favorite holiday, Thankgiving!

Things with the boy are better than ever and I feel incredibly lucky. The more time we spend together the more I smile and I can honestly say I couldn't be happier...sorry, that's all you get!

My three best friends and I went apple picking in October and to our chagrin there were no apples left on the trees! Can you believe it?! We've had this tradition for a few years and apparently, apple-picking season is getting shorter and shorter. We made the best of it by scooping apples out of bins and making our pies but there is something to be said for the real thing.

 

           

The next item on the fall-fun to do list was camping and pumpkin carving. Camping was a little-rocky, cold and darker than anticipated but altogether a great experience. We drove about an hour and a half from the city, and slept under the stars (and on top of some rocks). It was a short trip and next time, we will be a bit more prepared.

Pumpkin carving was a blast and the boy and I had a competition with my PIC and her boyfriend. I don't think we ever decided who won but it was a lot of fun to carve pumpkins, roast the seeds and enjoy fall beer with friends. 

Our spooky pumpkin. Carving courtesy of the boy.

Hurricane Sandy whipped through New York a few days later and while I was extremely fortunate to not withstand any damage, there were many people who were not as lucky. The Saturday following the storm a few friends and I loaded a car with supplies and headed to Staten Island to distribute what we could and assist in the relief effort. It felt great to give back knowing how many people lost everything and seeing the community we visited first-hand, we know the help was needed.

Halloween fell somewhere in the mix and it was particularly special for me this year because I was lucky enough to meet the boy's older sister and nephew and take him trick-or-treating for his first time ever! He didn't completely get the concept but loved dressing up...and we loved his candy.

Yo Gabba Gabba fueling up for the night

Hip and I trick-or-treating

One of the many decked-out houses in Sunnyside Gardens

My favorite holiday, Thanksgiving, wrapped up November and I was extremely lucky to have two celebrations this year. First, our first annual Friendsgiving with Marlee, Jesse, Megan and all of our significant others and then the real Thanskgiving a few days later.

I absolutely love Thanksgiving. The flavors, the colors, the smells, the time with family- to me, it's perfect and I'm so glad I had the chance to spend the holiday with my whole family again this year. My grandparents flew in from Florida and it was great spending time with them after a few months apart. They are two of the most amazing people I know and I am so fortunate to have them both in my life.

That just about wraps up the fall-fun. December is going to speed by between holiday parties, friends visits, trips (i've got two lined up!) and of course the New York holiday activities.

Stay tuned.

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